Ratchet and Clank: All For You
by Stohne Rohse
Summary: It's been three weeks after Nefarious' journey on Magnus, and Lawrence couldn't help but notice something was very wrong with him. The doctor wouldn't leave his room or speak to the butler at all. With no idea what to do, Lawrence has no choice but to turn to the scientist's old teammates. And a certain someone might realize he doesn't hate Nefarious as much as he thought... {DIFC}
1. Chapter 1

**_I, Stohne Rohse, pledge that in no way am I claiming ownership, nor that I created the characters DR. NEFARIOUS, LAWRENCE, QWARK, CLANK, AND RATCHET in this story. I will never attempt to claim any monetary value nor financial gain from this story. My purpose for these stories is for writing practice in a peer-reviewed environment and for the enjoyment of the fans and users of this site only. _**

Days were long. Longer than normal. _Much_ longer than normal. After locking yourself away in an abandoned moon base staring at a photograph, minutes quickly became hours, and hours quickly became days on end. Nefarious had spent every day since his journey on Magnus the same way, making it a very long three weeks. And of course, the only one to notice this strange behavior was the scientist's butler.

Lawrence was growing concerned as the hiatus in activity grew. True, he enjoyed the peace and quiet, but only for the first few days. Nefarious had been silent for three weeks straight, and Lawrence had no seen his employer since they landed. At first, Lawrence dismissed his employer's absence as a private work session, and so had no hesitation to ask Nefarious if he wanted to conduct a mission at least twice a day.

Every time, the doctor would respond with a snappy comment or threat, which was a typical response. However, as normal as it might have been, none of his hostile responses were straight answers. As the butler got enough of these answers, Lawrence realized something was wrong and couldn't help but wonder if the doctor's expedition on Magnus was causing this strange behavior.

Lawrence took in a small breath as he stood in front of the huge metal door. He knew for sure that Nefarious was inside, but the dead silence from within wavered his certitude.

"Sir?" He called through the metal door, rapping it lightly with the tips of his knuckles. "Are you there...?"

There was a single moment of reticence before Lawrence got an answer.

"Go away. I'm...busy." Nefarious shouted through the door in an irascible tone, his response accompanied by quiet shuffling.

"Sir, I couldn't help but notice you haven't been acting normal lately," Lawrence spoke in all truth, not at all fearing the possible consequences. "Is something wrong?"

Several moments passed, and Lawrence only heard the muted stillness on the other side of the iron curtain.

"...May I come in, sir?" Lawrence finally asked, listening with an ear on the door. No answer.

Taking a deep breath, the butler turned the handle only to observe a shadowy room filled with debris. There was ancient cords dangling from the ceiling, every so often letting off blue and yellow sparks, briefly illuminating the dark room. The only sign of his employer that Lawrence could see in the gloom was the faint, red glows of Nefarious' optics at the far end of the chamber.

Lawrence stepped into the room, making sure to prop up the door behind him.

"Sir?" Lawrence called out. Nefarious' eyes snapped up onto him almost instantly.

"Lawrence! What are you doing?! Get out!" Nefarious snapped, rapid shuffling following his words. Lawrence ignored him, taking another step closer.

"Sir, I can't help but notice that you have been acting strangely. You haven't left this room in three weeks. Is there something you're not telling me?" Lawrence asked, his blue eyes glowing brightly in the dark.

"What? Three weeks?" Nefarious asked, sounding wholeheartedly puzzled. Lawrence tilted his head slightly.

"You've been in here for three weeks, sir." The butler repeated in a blunt deadpan. This problem was more serious that he originally thought. Nefarious was completely oblivious.

"It...hasn't been three weeks, you moron! Just a few hours, that's all!" Nefarious denied, waving a hand in the air. Lawrence simply shook of his master's rejection, not wanting to get into an argument, and continued on with the questioning.

"What has you so preoccupied, sir?" The butler asked, crossing his arms.

"None of your business." Nefarious snapped, turning his back on his butler.

"Sir, I can't help you unless you tell me." Lawrence's voice became slightly firmer.

"Get lost! I'm fine!"

"You don't seem fine to me, sir."

"I'm _FINE!_"

"I'm trying to help you."

"I don't want your help!" Nefarious was suddenly on his feet, staring right into Lawrence's face with a furious glare. The butler shrank back and simply returned his employer's glare with a blank gaze of his own and said nothing. Nefarious' fierce look eventually softened, and he sighed, taking a step away and putting a claw on his forehead.

"...Please forgive me, sir. I didn't mean to upset you. I'm just worried for you, that's all." Lawrence said slowly, taking a step back, putting some distance between himself and his master. Who knows what he might do if he got mad enough. Nefarious shook his head.

"I'm just...stressed. Now bounce. I need to be alone." Nefarious rubbed his head a moment before turning away and walking back into the darkness.

"Yes, sir." The butler nodded once before making his way out the door. Nefarious watched as his servant shut off the outside illumination, enveloping the room in complete shadows once again.

On the other side of the door, Lawrence rubbed his hands together, his meeting with the scientist only making his concern more powerful. There was something off about the way Nefarious was acting, and even for all the years Lawrence had known the doctor, he knew not how to solve the problem. Something was telling him that his journey on Magnus was responsible for his attitude, but he had absolutely no proof. Lawrence was at a complete loss. All he could do was wait for his master to gain closure on his own. After all, there was no point in pestering him and potentially making the problem worse.

True, Lawrence was worried, but he also wasn't stupid. He knew Nefarious well, and constant attention wasn't the correct course of action when he was upset. And yes, Lawrence knew it sounded weird, but it was the best course of action.

Taking a quick walk down the base hallway, Lawrence reached his quarters and quickly seated himself down on a worn-down but surprisingly comfortable couch. It was the one bit of furniture in the room that wasn't completely destroyed. Relaxing his back, Lawrence laid into the couch, closing his optics and rubbing his eyelids. Nefarious was stressing the butler's circuits to their full limit. His peculiar behavior wasn't just worrying, it was heavy with suspicion.

What had happened between Ratchet, Clank and Qwark while they were marooned on Magnus? If Lawrence was to give the matter his best bet, he'd say _Qwark_ had something to do with Nefarious' abnormal mood. It was something he wouldn't mind betting his life on. He knew very well that Nefarious hated Qwark with every single sprocket in his body. The scientist would rant about the president constantly, and he would often take his anger out on Lawrence.

The butler had quickly become used to the doctor's rage-fits, and as time passed, the fits became longer and more severe to the point where you could practically see the hatred emanating off his body. It was always an ordeal for Lawrence, as his audio sensors couldn't absorb that much screaming in one sitting. The same thing went for Nefarious in a different sense. The scientist would rage for a good two hours or so, his vocal processors would crack, then he would either short-circuit or collapse with exhaustion.

And if Lawrence were to tell the truth, it was rather difficult to watch. It was the doctor's only way of letting out his inner stress, Lawrence knew that, he just wished the doctor wouldn't take it out on him.

But all this was just the question. If something happened between Nefarious and Qwark, he would have heard about it by now, that was a certainty. So maybe it wasn't a hostility issue. Maybe it didn't have anything to do with Qwark, Ratchet and Clank at all. Lawrence sighed with frustration.

Nefarious was the only one who knew what was wrong, and he refused to speak to anyone about it.

Unless of course, his teammates on Magnus know. He could send a message out to them and ask them if anything peculiar had occurred. Lawrence knew it was a risky situation, giving away his master's position, but the butler feared that Nefarious would never emerge from his isolation. It was the only solution he could think of.

Lawrence stood up and searched about his things for his holo-transmitter. If anyone knew what happened, it would be Ratchet. Now, all he needed to do was recall his number. _555...678...8293-0? No, no, 8293-02. Yes, that was it. 555 678 8293-02._

With a brief nod, Lawrence sent his summons to the Aphelion's contact address. There was a burst of static until the signal finally connected. Shutting down their security firewall so as to avoid being ignored, Lawrence hoped he would be able to convince the heroes to help him.

"I have no idea whose number this is, Qwark!" Lawrence caught onto an argument taking place aboard the Aphelion.

"It's probably one of my voters!" Qwark's voice retorted.

"Pardon me, but have I reached the correct number?" Lawrence interrupted them. And judging by the silence that followed, they couldn't figure out whom had just spoken.

"Was that Lawrence?" Clank finally spoke up.

"Wha-? Lawrence? Nah, he couldn't have got my number." Said Ratchet.

"No, no. You are correct. This is indeed Lawrence." The butler clarified with a voice loud and clear. There was a brief pause before Qwark broke the silence.

"You got some nerve calling us, Lawrence! After that little scheme you pulled, I'm gonna get the _entire galactic defense force_ on this signal!" Qwark immediately began in with threats, wavering Lawrence's confidence.

"Hang on a minute, Qwark. Lawrence, what'cha callin' for?" Ratchet asked.

"I have a serious question for the three of you," Lawrence hesitated a moment. "so please hear me out."

"...Well...alright then." Ratchet also sounded tentative, and Lawrence could hear Qwark furiously whispering something in the background.

"Nefarious has been acting...strangely since we left you all on Magnus..." Lawrence chose his words carefully to avoid portraying Nefarious as vulnerable.

"What do you mean strangely? He actually seemed more normal than ever when you guys left." Ratchet said, disdain hiding in his tone.

"Well, when we landed our ship on one of Magnus' abandoned moon bases, he slipped away to the central room and I didn't see or hear from him for three weeks. Did...something go on between the four of you?" Lawrence asked, fearing the answer. There was a brief silence.

"I guess you could say that. Nothing bad, just a little weird. Like, after Qwark saved him from falling off the ledge in the hall of paradoxology-"

"Excuse me?" Lawrence cut the Lombax off, his optics opened wide. That was definitely not what he was expecting to hear. Ratchet stammered on the other line a few times before he cleared his throat and began again.

"Yeah. In the lab, Nefarious almost fell and Qwark caught him. Easy as that." Ratchet's words were a bit more cautious than before. Lawrence was struck speechless. It was a very confusing situation for the butler, but probably even more so for Nefarious. _Captain Qwark saves arch-enemy Dr. Nefarious from falling to his death._ Lawrence could hear the news article already.

"Uh...hey, you still there?" Ratchet said uncertainly. Lawrence shook himself back into reality, his eyes wide with surprise.

"Y-yes, of course. It's just...I wasn't expecting this at all." The butler stumbled for words.

"Yeah, anyways, so for the rest of the trip, he was pretty chill around us. So I guess we kinda started treating him like a friend." Ratchet's voice was full of honesty as he spoke. Lawrence carefully considered the situation.

So that was the reason Nefarious had gone into hiding. He was sad about leaving his friends. The butler never would have guessed his employer had it in him to have friends. The scientist he knows is cantankerous, cruel, and above all; completely out of his mind. Was it even remotely possible that the three of them could change him?

"I see. Well, you've answered my question in all truth, I appreciate that. But now I have a favor to ask, if you don't mind." Lawrence waited for his answer patiently.

"Uh...sure?"

"...Would you mind coming up here and getting him to leave his room? I've gotten nowhere talking to him myself, and I was hoping that since you are so well acquainted, you might be able to help." Lawrence spoke quickly, not necessarily wanting to hear the words he was saying. He knew it was foolish inviting his employer's arch-enemies out to their location, but this situation was too dire to ignore. The butler had no one else to turn to.

However, to the butler's distress, a prolonged silence came immediately after his request. Lawrence suspected reluctance almost immediately.

"If not, then I suppose he'll have to manage. It's not completely required." Lawrence sighed, starting to give up. But instead, to his surprise, it was Qwark that spoke up.

"We'll come." The president spoke firmly. Furious whispering followed his proposal almost immediately.

"Qwark, are you nuts?!" Lawrence could barely overhear their conversation.

"We do not know for sure if Nefarious has truly changed his ways. Landing on a moon occupied with him could lead to catastrophic results. Who knows what the doctor is planning!" Clank objected with a distrustful tone.

"Now, now, you two. I am perfectly confident that we will be in no danger in Nefarious' presence. Didn't you just hear the butler guy on the line? He's down in the dumps! And as a faithful, brave, and considerate president, it is my job to assist those in need!" Qwark silenced both of them with a patriotic speech. Lawrence could imagine him now, standing in the Aphelion with his chest puffed out.

"...Alright, Qwark. You win, we'll go." Ratchet sighed in a unenthusiastic tone.

"Yes, we will go. But I still have a bad feeling about this..." Clank mumbled dubiously. Lawrence let a faint smile hush onto his face.

Help was on the way.


	2. Chapter 2

Lawrence made his way down the hallway to Nefarious' room as quickly as his feet would carry. The Aphelion had landed about an hour after his summons, and the three were waiting just outside the moon base for Lawrence and his master's appearance. They were already inconvenienced, so Lawrence knew it was best to appear as quickly as possible to avoid causing them to grow bored and leave.

Reaching Nefarious' door, Lawrence pulled it open without knocking. Bright light poured into the room, fully illuminating the demolished office. At the far end of the chamber, Nefarious turned his head towards the open door, immediately causing him to shut his eyes and let an irritated growl escape his jaws.

"LAWRENCE?! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?! EXPLAIN THIS TO ME NOW!" Nefarious shrieked, holding up a hand to block the light from reaching his eyes, which were gleaming with rage.

"Sir, your visitors have arrived," Lawrence said quickly. "we must head outside to meet them before they leave."

Nefarious' eyes narrowed.

"What visitors?" He hissed suspiciously.

"Well, I suspected you might need some assistance emerging from your depression, and since you refused to speak with me about your issue, I asked Ratchet, Clank and Qwark to land here. Perhaps _they_ might be able to help, sir." Lawrence's voice did not waver once, even though he knew he would get all hell for doing exactly what he was instructed _not_ to do.

Nefarious' eye twitched as steam and sparks began to fly from the dome on his head.

"LAAAAAWREEE-" Nefarious would have finished his shout if not for a flash of green flying past Lawrence and barreling into the furious scientist.

"Nefarious, my old friend! How's it going?" Qwark cried as he scooped up Nefarious into a squishing hug.

"Wha-? QWARK?! TAKE YOUR SQUISHY HANDS OFF ME!" Nefarious shrieked, swiping his claws at the air. Lawrence turned around, only to see Ratchet and Clank slowly making their way down the hall. The Lombax appeared to be straining his face into a smile, while Clank looked absolutely skeptical.

"Ah, good. You've come in. I apologize, I should have let you in myself." Lawrence apologized, stepping to the side so as to let the Lombax and small robot by him into the room.

"Thank you, Lawrence." Clank commented quietly as he followed his friend inside.

"Ahh, it's good to see you after all this time. It seems like just yesterday you saved me from that evil Loki." Qwark sighed, dropping Nefarious on the floor and wiping an imaginary tear from his eye. The scientist stumbled away from him, blasting Qwark with a powerful glower.

"It was two weeks ago, you moron!" Nefarious snapped, brushing off his arms.

"Alright, Nefarious. What's the deal." Ratchet said in a flat tone, his ears laid back slightly. Nefarious shot him a look of daggers.

"_Alright, Nefarious, what's the deal,_" Nefarious parroted in a voice intended to sound like Ratchet. "what do you mean what's the deal?! Why are you here?! What do you want?!" The scientist huffed, crossing his arms.

"We got a call saying there's something wrong with ya. Lawrence got a hold of us and told us you wouldn't come out of your room." Ratchet explained, making a backwards gesture at Lawrence. Nefarious shot his gaze onto the butler in a heartbeat.

"You did _WHAT?!_" Nefarious roared, curling his fingers. The butler opened his mouth to speak, but was immediately cut off by Qwark.

"Hey, c'mon now, Nefarious! We're all pals here, we can talk, right?" Qwark put an arm around the scientist and rubbed his head with his knuckles. Nefarious let out an annoyed his, shoving the president away.

"No. I want you all gone. Get lost! Scram! Beat it!" Nefarious began waving his claws in the air.

"Oh, no you don't. We did _not_ just fly all the way out here to some abandoned moon listening to Qwark babble about being the president just so you could tell us to get out!" Ratchet retorted, stepping forward.

"Ratchet is right, doctor. We are here to help, whether you want us to or not." Clank commented, his green eyes locked on Nefarious' red. The scientist let out an exasperated growl, turning his gaze sideways to glare at Lawrence.

"This is all your fault." He snarled.

"I'm fully aware of that, sir." The butler responded, shrugging indifferently. Nefarious let out a growl, not able to find a comeback to Lawrence's unconcerned statement.

"Get out. I'll deal with you later." Nefarious commanded as he pointed at the door. Lawrence gave him a blank look, then simply turned around and left the room without another word.

"Ahh, good. Now it's just the four of us, together again!" Qwark sighed happily, walking over to the far end of the room and plopping himself down on the couch. Nefarious crossed his arms, turning his back on the heroes.

"Yeah...together again. Hey, uh, Clank, would'ja get the lights?" Ratchet sighed, quickly changing the subject.

"Certainly. Doctor? Where is the light switch?" Clank asked. Nefarious could feel the smaller robot's gaze on his back. Letting a small smirk crease onto his face, Nefarious kept his mouth shut and ignored the android. A few moments passed before a giggle escaped the Zoni son's mouth.

"Oh, what a marvelous answer. I would love to play a game of hot and cold. Now, tell me, doctor, am I getting warmer?" Clank put his hand on the wall and took a few slow steps forward. Nefarious said nothing to him once more, his grin growing wider.

"Mm...I think I am getting closer..." Clank said in a playful tone. Nefarious turned his head slightly, and saw that the android was actually extremely close to the central light switch, his hand just a few inches away.

"...warmer..." Nefarious mumbled, putting his hand on his chin. Clank's small smile grew wider as the scientist spoke. In response to the doctor's clue, Clank moved his hand forward a small ways.

"Warmer..."

Another inch.

"Warmer..."

Clank's hand was now hovering over the switch. Nefarious' grin grew wider.

"Hot. Red hot." He said quietly, tilting his head slightly.

"Oh, goodie. I do think I found it..." Clank was just about to flip the switch before Qwark had jumped to his feet and rushed to the switch, pushing Clank out of the way and flipping the switch on.

"Got it! I win!" He exclaimed, puffing up his chest and striking a pose. It was a moment before the old lights flickered on, showering the room in sparks in the process.

"Oh, dear." Clank groaned, rubbing his head as Ratchet stood him back up.

"Did you guys see that? I was so fast! I was like, _hoo-ha!_ _Yeah!_ Bet you wish you were me." Qwark gloated, showing off his arms and thighs.

"Yeah. Great, Qwark." Ratchet rolled his eyes. Nefarious clenched his jaw, his smile now a frown.

"Well, at least the lights are operational." Clank sighed, shaking his head and retaining an optimistic smile.

"Yeah, I guess you're right, bud. So...um...Nefarious? You like...live here now or something?" Ratchet rubbed the back of his head nervously, attempting to make conversation to fill the awkward moment. Nefarious turned his head away from the threesome and said nothing.

"Um...Nef?" Ratchet asked, tilting his ears towards the doctor, listening hard for an answer. The only sound that could be heard was the faint humming of Nefarious' inner circuitry and the clicking of the machinery in his head. The doctor's mouth was silent.

"Nefarious?" Ratchet said again.

Silence.

"Alright, alright. That's enough, Ratchet. He ain't in the mood for talking. Maybe he just needs some alone time." Qwark stepped forward, attempting to shoo Ratchet and Clank out the door.

"Qwark, he's had alone time for three weeks straight. Don't you think there's something fishy about that?" Ratchet dropped his voice low so as not to attract the doctor's attention. Little did he know that Nefarious' audio sensors were very acute, and the doctor was listening to every word they said with a profound curiosity.

"Ratchet, Ratchet, Ratchet. So naive. Tell ya what, you go wait out there, and I'll try to talk him out of it. Alright? Good. Now out with you." Qwark made another attempt at getting them to leave.

"Oh, that's _really_ funny, Qwark. You really had me with the whole _he needs alone time, so I better stick around and bug him some more_ act. Hysterical. Tell me another joke." Ratchet made a sarcastic laugh. Qwark frowned.

"You shouldn't doubt my wisdom, young Lombax." He mumbled, now pushing Ratchet and Clank out the door.

"Pff. _Wisdom_. Good one, but not as good as the last one." Ratchet mocked.

"Alright, that's enough. Out of here! Shoo! I'll take care of Nefarious, just you wait!" Qwark pushed him out, then slammed the door shut.

"If he kills you, I'm not taking your place as president." Ratchet said on the other side of the door, his voice trailing off as he walked away. Qwark brushed his hands together, turning to face Nefarious, who had his back turned to the green-clad hero.

"Ah. There. Got rid of 'em for ya," Qwark sighed, walking back over to the couch and seating himself comfortably on the piece of furniture. "now we can talk."

"There's nothing to talk about." Nefarious snapped, turning his head slightly, his red optics narrowed to slits.

"Oh, that is _such_ a lie. You're a liar, Nefarious. Liar, liar, liar," Qwark repeated the word over and over again, causing Nefarious' claws to twitch each time he heard it. "Liar, liar, liar. You. Are. A...hey, wait a minute. What's this?" Qwark stopped himself.

Nefarious turned his head slightly to see what had cut Qwark off so abruptly, and saw the green-clad hero staring down at a photograph held in his large hands. The realization hit Nefarious like a ton of rocks.

"Hey, don't touch that, it's mine!" Nefarious rushed to try and take the photograph, but Qwark held it out of his grasp without any trouble.

"Ah ha! Well, now, we got you now, don't we?" Qwark chuckled, pushing the scientist away from him so he could examine the photograph closer. Nefarious let out an annoyed grunt, stepping back and blasting Qwark with a hateful glare.

"Let's see what kind of-" Qwark stopped himself as he finally got a good look at the photograph. Nefarious turned away, not wanting Qwark to see him.

"...This is...this is our photograph. You kept it?" Qwark asked, looking up from the picture. Nefarious could feel his startled gaze on his back.

"Of course I did, you imbecile." Nefarious mumbled, turning back around but avoiding eye contact.

"Why?" Judging by his tone, Qwark was utterly shocked by Nefarious' action.

"Why do you care? I just did." Nefarious hissed, his optics narrowed at the floor.

"You...care?" Qwark suddenly asked.

"I never said that! I just kept it! Sheesh!" Nefarious exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air.

"You wouldn't have kept it if you didn't care, Nefarious." Qwark's voice was barely a mumble as he looked back down onto the photo, a small grin creasing onto his face.

"I didn't even keep that stupid thing on purpose, you twit! It got mixed in my pockets and brought back here." Nefarious lied, tapping his foot impatiently. Qwark looked up at the scientist, his small smile now a mischievous smirk.

"Nice try. You don't even have pockets." Qwark's eyes strayed down to the doctor's waist and back up to his shocked expression.

"Alright! Fine! I'll come clean. There's no point in hiding it anyways..." Nefarious murmured, rubbing his arms with his claws. Qwark's mischievous grin melted into an interested expression, and he leaned forward slightly, keen for the doctor's explanation.

"After our journey on Magnus, I felt something a little different surging through my circuitry. I wasn't angry, which...bothered me for some reason-"

"You were feeling weird because you _weren't_ ticked off at something?" Qwark interrupted.

"Let me finish! As I was saying, I wasn't angry. Not even a little. Instead, I was thrust into a peculiar...depression. I wanted to be furious instead. I tried my hardest to be evil again...I wanted to crush a squishy's neck in my claws...!" Nefarious curled his fingers as he whirled around, kicking a box of junk into the wall. "...but I couldn't."

"Um...so you're saying that...you're...no. No, I'm completely lost. I don't get what'cha mean." Qwark said flatly, shaking his head and shrugging. Nefarious rolled his optics, letting out an annoyed snort.

"I'm saying that after the journey on Magnus, I didn't feel like myself. I suppose what I'm trying to say is that I felt alright about...you know...saving a planet. It made my gears turn with delight and abhorrence at the same time. Like I could strangle the life out of an entire Fongoid family...or save them instead..." Nefarious sounded as if he was talking to himself rather than Qwark.

"Um...okay?" Qwark sounded utterly confused. Nefarious turned to face him, a sad look on his face.

"Tell me, Qwark...can I even still call myself a supervillain?" Nefarious asked suddenly, his red eyes locked into an expression Qwark had never seen the maniacal doctor take on. Was it..._desperation?_

"Of course, Nefarious! In fact, if I was to pick a fruit that best describes your personality, I wouldn't even be able to pick the lemon because it's sweeter than you are!" Qwark tried to lift the moment with an insult-compliment. _Maybe all the doctor needed was a confidence boost._

However, to Qwark's dismay, the scientist did not perk up.

"...I've gone soft, haven't I? I've become like a squishy...haven't I?" Nefarious' voice was barely a whisper, his eyes locked in Qwark's. The green-clad hero shook his head.

"Nope. There you go again. You're _still_ a liar. You are the most evil person I have ever seen. You're not soft, and you're certainly not a squishy." Qwark replied, gently punching Nefarious in the arm to present the metal sound it made when he did. Nefarious looked down at Qwark's hand, then back to his face.

"Really?" Nefarious asked quietly, blinking. Qwark nodded.

"Of course, old friend. I'm _definitely_ not a liar. They wouldn't re-elect me if _I _was a liar." Qwark gently pushed the photograph into Nefarious' claws, then puffed up his chest and pretended to pose for a presidential portrait. Nefarious stared down at the photograph for a moment before he crossed his arms behind his back and stood up straighter.

"And you, my old nemesis, are the ugliest, most arrogant, bigheaded, brainless, idiotic twit I have _ever_ laid optics on." Nefarious insulted, flashing the president a roguish sneer.

"Oh, thanks a lot, bolt bucket." Qwark retorted, returning the doctor's grin with one of his own.

"Get bent." Nefarious said quietly, averting his gaze to the floor.

"Up yours." Qwark quickly made a comeback.

"Alright, I've had enough of you! Get lost! Out! Go keep your cat and his backpack company and leave me alone." Nefarious shoved Qwark towards the door, hiding his smile behind a glare.

"Fine! I'm goin!" Qwark exclaimed, opening the door before Nefarious pushed him into it. Nefarious forced the president a few more inches into the hall before he turned him around and brought his face close to his to end their evening with one last insult.

"Twit."


End file.
